Digest this

I reached home on a friday evening and got a red carpet reception from my neighbours and their school-going grandson M. I raised my eyebrows very suspiciously and my mom had this deja-vu look on her face. M had a science exhibition in school and wanted my help to do some drawings. M's grand-dad showers me with compliments "Akka does drawings (pointing to one painting of mine) so this is nothing for her".  I smelt something fishy of course. The bombshell was then surreptitiously dropped. The kid mumbled that he wanted me to draw "Digestive System" !!! It was like a bad childhood memory for me. I have never liked Biology and now I had gotten myself into this - I couldn't refuse because of the million 'please akka's' repeated to me :-( 

I was half tempted to ask uncle - 'so, should I do a Tanjore style and stick stones in the Pancreas or would you like me to paint it on a pot (pot belly you see)' ;-P His weekend project taken care of, the kid ran away. Literally. I told M I would draw it for him and offered to teach him to paint it so that he also felt he contributed to it.  Turned out he was extra-smart (and extra-lazy). I forgot to mention this initially - M studied in Mysore. Imagine. So this uncle has told him that there is this bakra girl who would draw and he came happily to ajji-mane (grandmom's house) to enjoy the weekend! When I suggested that we do the painting together, he sheepishly tells me that he was going to Puttaparthi  the following morning & returning 2 days later. So his master-plan was to collect the completed project from me and leave for Mysore. I nearly fainted !!!! School-kid outsourcing work to me !!!! This is called asli bakra banana*. I was indignant now, but ... Some more emotional pleas and I relented. 

     I had the diagram ready by Sunday evening but I was too busy and couldn't paint it. He thanked me and said he would paint it himself. I looked doubtful. Out came the truth. He would make his mother do it. Boys I tell you. M was just like my brother. I did all sorts of projects for my brother - Circus Tent , Taj Mahal, blah-blah. 



Few weeks later


My mom was talking to someone on the phone who was complaining of stomach-ache. The caller was describing exactly where the pain was to my mother , who suddenly became the human body expert. They were turning the insides of my stomach with their vivid descriptions, at least my mom's which I could unfortunately hear - 'where? right of stomach?' , 'that must be your appendix' , 'wait wait, maybe its kidney stone'.. and so on and so forth! Then suddenly my mom says ' hold on for a second, let me ask c -exactly where is the appendix ;  she drew the digestive system for a kid recently' !!!! 


Me (angrily) , 'Amma, I knew where the appendix is even before that 'hot assignment' came my way' !! 


This is why I often say - Family members! Their way of appreciating me is by saying the right/wrong things at the wrong/right times ;-D 


Majja madi!!


* akka - elder sister in Tamil  //  *amma - mom in Tamil // * asli bakra banana - scape-goat in Hindi // *majja madi - have fun in Kannada  (wow..I  yam a true linguist. wink)